Stay at Home Mom Mental Health: Finding Joy Amidst the Chaos

Being a stay-at-home mom with mental health issues is a mix of challenges and rewards. I wear many hats—teacher, chef, cleaner, caregiver—all while managing bi-polar disorder. But in the midst of this chaos, I’ve found pockets of joy that transform my experience and bring fulfillment to my days.

The Joy of Home Schooling

Home schooling has become an essential part of our family life. At first, I worried about my teaching abilities, especially with my mental health challenges. But I soon realized that teaching at home allows me to customize lessons to my children's interests and needs.

Incorporating various forms of learning makes it feel less like a chore and more like an adventure. For example, we often use video games, Eli's main love in life, in our lessons, as he is able to show me what he learned through games like Minecraft or Roblox. This approach not only boosts his understanding of the topic at hand but also fills me with happiness to see him learning and engaged. Studies show that children retain 75% of what they learn through active engagement compared to just 5-10% through passive learning.

I appreciate the close bond we’re building through our home school activities, creating an environment where learning is engaging and personal.

Managing the House: Cleaning and Cooking

When I first took on the role of a stay-at-home mom, I envisioned a pristine home with gourmet meals. The reality hit hard. Cleaning and cooking can feel overwhelming, especially while managing my mental health.

I’ve found it helpful to break tasks into smaller chunks. Instead of dedicating an entire day to cleaning, I spend just a few minutes each day on one small area and pick up as I see things throughout the house. Keeping a simple laundry basket handy in the main portion of the house and filling it as I go has helped tremendously in this area. This approach prevents burnout and keeps our home looking decent without the pressure of a marathon session. Additionally, I have learned to be gentle with myself. When I'm having a particularly bad day, I know there are areas that will be there tomorrow and let it go. Fortunately, I have a very loving and understanding husband, in this regard.

Keeping a simple laundry basket in the main part of the house helps to cut down the clutter each day.

Meal prep has also become my lifesaver. I spend an hour or so each week taking inventory of our pantry and meal plan for the coming week. This not only saves time during busy weeks but also keeps our grocery spending in check. In fact, families that meal plan can save up to 30% on their grocery bills.

The Reality of Loneliness

One of the overlooked aspects of being a stay-at-home mom is loneliness. My days might be busy, yet most of the time I yearn for adult conversation and connection. I find myself missing my best friend - my husband - constantly, waiting patiently for him to get home each day.

I have struggled in this area for far too long, allowing myself to sink into depressions over and over. To combat this, I’ve decided I need to establish a schedule that includes regular calls with friends and family. Joining homeschooling groups in our new area would be invaluable for myself, as well as for Eli. Engaging with other parents who face similar challenges may help me feel connected, reminding me that I’m not alone on this journey.

Navigating Bi-Polar Disorder

Living with bi-polar disorder adds complexity to my daily life. Some days are marked by energy and excitement, while others can feel heavy and dark.

I've learned to identify my triggers and implement coping strategies. For instance, having a morning routine helps me start the day on a positive note. On difficult days, I allow myself breaks—whether it's journaling, crocheting, coloring, working out, or simply resting. Prioritizing self-care is crucial, and I have started to remind myself there's no guilt in taking time for my well-being.

Communicating openly with my children about my feelings, when appropriate, helps normalize emotions. I used to struggle with this as well, wanting to protect my children from the harsh reality of my disorder, but through therapy and encouragement, I have learned to embrace it and use it to teach them about mental health awareness and empathy.

Fun Activities on a Budget

Quality family time doesn't have to be expensive. In our new location especially, there are many free or low-cost activities to enjoy together.

Local parks, nature trails, and community events offer wonderful opportunities to explore. Crafting or having movie nights can be just as fun as pricier outings. Engaging in simple, creative projects often lifts our spirits without straining our budget.

Making Time for Myself

As a stay-at-home mom, it's easy to get lost in everyone else's needs, often neglecting my well-being. I’ve discovered that carving out time for myself is not a luxury; it's essential.

Whether it's savoring a quiet cup of coffee in the wee hours of the morning before the house is awake or practicing meditation and breathing quietly in my room, these moments of solitude recharge me. They allow me to approach daily chaos with renewed energy and positivity.

Meditation in soft light.

Embracing the Journey

While being a stay-at-home mom is complex, especially when managing bi-polar disorder, I’ve discovered it can also be a source of joy.

By embracing the chaos, focusing on our family's specific needs, and practicing self-care, I’ve found a balance that works for us. Each challenge brings a lesson, illuminating the beauty in this unique journey.

To all the stay-at-home parents juggling similar demands—whether you're homeschooling, cleaning, cooking, or simply trying to make it through another day—remember that the chaos can be a canvas for joyful moments. Embrace each day, and always make time for yourself amidst the whirlwind of family life.